Subscribe!
Starcharts and stickers and discipline
About a month ago, dudelet finally reached the point where he could not only comprehend a relatively sophisticated rewards chart but could visualise the advantages of being sufficiently well-behaved over the course of a week to rack up the 20 stickers necessary for a “grand prize”. This was brought home to us quite literally when, given a five pound book token at some sort of school event, he chose to spend it on a sticker chart allowing the tracking of five different tasks over the course of a week. It came with an elaborate array of tiny stickers and he wanted to start there and then. So we did.
Currently, he gets his choice of star, crown, flower or any of a myriad other themes for achieving
- getting up after 7am (oh yes!)
- Getting dressed nicely without any fuss
- Being especially helpful with dudelette (i.e. waiting patiently for his stories whilst supermum puts her to bed)
- Eating all his supper
- Getting his pyjamas on and going to bed nicely (nicely is such an adaptable adverb)
He probably scores an average of three stickers a day and the threat of the loss of a sticker is frequently enough to bring him into line. The ultimate sanction at the moment, of course, is the deprivation of Doctor Who. Doctor Who is still an utter hero for dudelet and I have to say
that I approve. Though supermum continues to loathe both David Tenant’s eyebrows and his acting. Or maybe it’s the way his eyebrows do the acting. Dudelet and I, however, are jointly entranced.
For me, it’s a hotline to my childhood - my Doctor was Jon Pertwee (if you’re British, male and over thirty, the odds are, you have a Doctor.)
Who was yours? And no, Paul McGann doesn’t count.
Anyway, stickers. Beats shouting a lot any day of the week.
Filed under: toddler
Stickers definitely beat shouting. They worked for me when I was trying to train my two oldest to take on a few small chores around the house, because kids love working towards a goal. Oh, and I was more hardcore than you. 20 stickers = 1 gold star. 5 gold stars = treat.
Sylvester McCoy was my Dr. I know he isn’t very critically acclaimed, but at least he had Ace as a companion
I know his face but I’ve forgotten his name! He had yellow hair.
I can’t wait until Kiko understands star charts. At the moment the constant threat is: “Do this or go to bed. Do this or no play-play,” and needless to say it doesn’t work.
Sticker charts are magical. We have them too and it is more fun when two children are competing!
Dr Who was the man on that TV programme our cousins watched when we visited UK.
Whatever works is what you should do. And I am so impressed that the sticker chart was dudelet’s idea!
Hi, I’ve been reading your blog for a while now, but I have to disagree with your: ‘If you’re British, male and over thirty’ statement. While I fit into two of these conditions, I am female. Tom Baker is my Doctor, though Jon Pertwee runs a close second. Depriving my daughter of Doctor Who also proves a good threat to stop unwanted behaviour, though I think she enjoys the baddies more (she loves the Cybermen and Daleks, though she cuddles her Ood in bed).
After reading of your success with sticker charts, I might have to implement one with my daughter.
My kids have (sadly) outgrown the sticker chart. Luckily they seem to have attained a fair bit of reason and common sense, so more often that not, I don’t have to resort to threats and bribery.
My child was too old, I suspect, by the time I thought of using sticker charts. We would just take away something she wanted if she misbehaved. Sigh.
Hey - J, I wonder what sort of positive reinforcement works when they’re older? Does money count?
YM - the reason and common sense is not a surprise!
Ally - hiya! I should have clarified that if you’re female, the Doctor Who thing is common but if you’re male, it’s probably inevitable. I loved the Ood episode. Dudelet (aged 4) so totally got the fact that they weren;t monsters - “Look, they’re all singing! It’s so beautiful!” he shouted at the end. I think I’ll have to get the earlier series to introduce him to the Daleks.
Mizmel - well, we tried unsuccessfully about eight months ago but the something must have (sorry) stuck)
btrayner - ha! Similar culture gap issues exist with New Order for supermum who was completely unable to understand how four portly middle aged blokes could reduce the Brixton Academy (filled to bursting with other portly, middle aged blokes) to blubbering teenagers within four bars of “Love Will Tear Us Apart”
Helen - Peter Davidson? A specialised taste :)
Achelois - i know there was a reason we needed another one.
Dan - Tom Baker was also awesome - I’ve never forgotten the image of him hesitating, with the capacity to exterminate the Daleks in his hands - and deciding, despite all the horrow and devastation they;d visit upon the universe, that he hadn’t the right.
Charlotte - we just haven’t the stamina. Actually neither has he - by the time he’d accumulated 125 stickers, he’d have forgotten whatever it was we were working towards in the first place. Or we would.
I keep hoping to use a less sophisticated sticker chart to help A decide to use the potty. sounds like the boy is engaged in this reward system.
Sigh. Our one attempt at stickers during potty training didn’t work. But anything, ANYTHING to improve the dismal bedtimes we’ve been having would be welcome.
How sweet he paid for it himself.
He’ll wise up soon enough.